Back to School During a Pandemic: Adelphi's Institute for Parenting Director Shares Tips for Preparing for an Unusual School Year

Garden City, NY (09/01/2020) — With the unknowns of COVID-19 still looming and the previous school years' challenges still in mind, students and their parents may be heading anxiously into the upcoming school year.

After the difficulty of adjusting to remote learning in spring 2020 when the pandemic began, parents are concerned about how they can do "better" this time around. Joaniko Kohchi, parenting expert and director of Adelphi's Institute for Parenting, shares her tips for parents for navigating this new normal more successfully and with less stress.

"Preparing for a new school year brings excitement for its newness as well as shadows from past experience," says Kohchi. "The very first thing parents, and their children, need to remember is that nothing is ever going to be like spring 2020. We were collectively in shock and had to respond the best we could--and the 'we' includes school districts and teachers as well as parents and children."

Kohchi notes that through last spring's challenges, school districts, educators and experts have learned and made adjustments to make things work more effectively in the future. "Teachers now know a lot more about remote instruction and what our children need in order to learn, and we parents know more about what we need in order to support our children's learning as well as do our own work," she notes.

To help deal with the anxiety, Kohchi has four tips for success and to de-stress when faced with the difficulty of the upcoming school year:

1. Reduce stress: Cultivating kindness for yourself and your family members will reduce your stress. This is probably not the time to judge achievements in the harshest light. We know that stress erodes our immune systems and our sense of self-confidence. Encourage accomplishment, but reduce criticisms that wear down a sense of self. For example: "I saw you make a good choice for getting your work done," rather than "You are always so slow to get to work!"

2. Don't try to do it all at once: You can do more than you think, but probably not at the same time. Allow yourself a few minutes between appointments to build in a stretch, a glass of water, etc. Prioritize what cannot be adjusted (class time, meetings), ask for help, walk through your schedule to see if there are clusters of overlapping obligations, and then problem-solve as best you can. Remember your overarching goal is to reduce stress.

3. Don't try to do it all yourself: Delegating is difficult for many parents, but dividing tasks into smaller bits may allow for children to help too. A four-year-old can fold washcloths, wash lettuce or stack cans and may enjoy having a real job next to their parents or older siblings.

4. Places and Spaces: Routines will be established with or without planning, and will punctuate and bookend your days. Announce transition time and the next activity or task with positive anticipation whenever possible: "It is almost time to make lunch! I'm getting hungry, what about you?"

In spring 2020, in response to the pandemic, Kohchi and Adelphi's Institute for Parenting created a "Warmline" to provide support for parents and caregivers with non-emergency situations. The Warmline is still up and running, with parenting experts available by phone to assist community members who have questions about development, behavior, adjustment, and family matters. The service is free of charge and can be accessed by leaving a message at 516-515-1948. Learn more about the Warmline here.

According to Kohchi, no matter where and how school happens this year, preparing in advance, thinking about transitions, what will be different, and rehearsing it to prepare your child for new practices and routines are most important.

Kohchi points to poet Maya Angelou as a guide for families navigating this challenging time: "I learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."

In addition to the Warmline, Adelphi's Institute for Parenting will be providing virtual professional development programming this fall on important topics for our time. One workshop will be "Socioeconomic Inequality and Brain Development," and the other, "Psychopharmacology and Young Children." Additional workshops are planned for Spring 2021.

To arrange an interview with Kohchi, or use her comments in an upcoming story, let me know.

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